Chris Brown Lets it Rain on Ms. Umbrella Rihanna. Written by Kendall Sawyer
Young ladies around the world that love him, women old enough to be his mother that still would date him, and others that just love his music are all wondering the same thing. What really happened Chris? Did the R&B superstar Rihanna get a beating by Chris Brown for giving him herpes? Initial reports came in on Monday morning saying that Chris Brown was arrested and booked on charges of domestic violence and making felony criminal threats. This came after a steamy argument on the streets of L.A. where the pop princess Rihanna was left crying to 911 and Mr. Brown was no where to be found. He is currently out on $50,000 bail and is expected to appear in court on March 5th. Since the initial reports came in, the internet has started absolutely buzzin’ as more and more information has been coming in.
Chris turned himself into Los Angeles police Sunday night (February 8th) after a woman came forward claiming that she was attacked by the singer after they got into dispute. Police had initially refused to reveal the identity of the woman but The Los Angeles Times has confirmed that it is Rihanna. Although there was much to debate, one thing became a fact. Chris Brown gave Ms. Umbrella more than a few raindrops, he gave her a beating. The superstar scuffle occurred early Sunday morning and police say Rihanna’s face had several scratches and suffered bruises. She received medical attention at a local hospital and was release in a short amount of time. Chris & Rihanna both canceled their scheduled performances at Sunday night’s 51st Grammy Awards, due to the incident.
Chris Brown, making his debut to the music world in 2005 with his hit single “Run It”, has did just that! Run it for the past 4 years! Whether he is dancing, singing, or acting; he’s had much success, and with a squeaky clean record…until now. Just one year ago Chris made an appearance on the Tyra Banks show where he talked in depth about his mother being a victim of abuse when he was growing up. He talked about being scared every night to the point he didn’t want to get out of bed, so he would pee the bed. He then vowed to never hit a woman. But those words somehow got lost along with his endorsements. His ads with Wrigley’s gum have been pulled from television and Brown is being suspended until his legal woes conclude.
Bouncing back could be hard for both performers, but I would think more so for Chris. With his music being directly attached to the female crowd, he may have lost some fans ‘forever’. While on the other hand, Rihanna has always been the bad girl type (although naming her new album “Good Girl Gone Bad”) and may just be able to put this in her bag of naughty cases and move on. The next few months will tell a lot and hopefully we will still see them both back at the top of the charts.
What do you think about Chris Brown, Rihanna, and this tradegy? Holla back!
Kendall, Great post! I have heard bits and pieces and I’m sure there will continue to be new info unfolding daily. I love me some Chris Brown after seeing him in the Christmas movie “This Christmas”! Not only does he do a good acting job in the movie, his singing rendition of This Christmas is beautiful! I had it as my ring back on my phone during the holiday season.
I am not a big video watcher but I did see the video of him doing that song. He is a very gifted young, young man. I hate that this happened, will pray for them both, and since he is such a young man, pray that he can get himself together and can bounce back. I hope this won’t ruin his career and I hope Rihanna will be alright!
Everybody deserves a second chance!
Great story! When I heard about it, all I could do was say Wow, that’s sad! Chris, at 19, is way too young to be losing it like that. Hopefully, his lack of constraint and a level head will not cost him his career. He’s quite a talent, as is she. It will be interesting to see what is said when they both start talking. I heard this morning that it was a result of somebody flirting with her at the pre-Grammy party of Clive Davis’. It makes me think about a couple of nationally known preachers that went through the same beat down scenario in their hotel parking lot a couple of years ago.
Uh huh! I remember!
I have heard different stories as to why he did it, I just wish he hadn’t but, one mistake does not make the man! He can get help, get God, and get back up again!
I read about this the day of the Grammy’s. At that point, tney were not revealing the victim’s (Rhianna) name. But all sorts of speculations had begun (and it continues). I feel really bad for both of them because up until now, they’ve had ‘clean’ reputations. I think until both of them speak on it (as there’s always 3 sides to a story – his, hers and the truth) and provide some sort of insight as to what precipitated these actions, I will reserve from adding to the speculations.
Kim Sawyer’s last blog post..President Obama, You’re 2-1
True about the three sides but I guess, according to police reports, he did turn himself in for it.
Kathy: I have enjoyed everything you have ever written! Congrats&keep up the good work!!
Kendall this was a very good article. I was a little surprised about Chris,but not too much shocks me any more.
Miriam
Miriam Lewis’s last blog post..Chris Brown Lets it Rain on Ms. Umbrella Rihanna. Written by Kendall Sawyer
I have been reading about this since Monday and I’m still not in the clear what happened. At first it was herpes, then it was another female, after that they said it was a car accident. Until the details come out, I can’t slam Chris Brown.
I have heard about this story from several people and I’m not still clear on what happen, however I would say this- If Chris is wrong, he needs to pay the price like any other performer. Wrong is wrong. Chris Brown is in the “spot light” and when the camera is rolling or not, you can handle affairs in a decreet way to keep the media out of your business. I’m sad for Rihanna, because both performers are good and you just don’t need that negative exposure. I won’t put Chris Brown down, however I would not be happy for him either if he’s wrong.
Good article Kendall. I just hate it that this happened to such a gifted young talent that had seemingly everything going in his favor. I pray that there is someone in both these young people’s lives that is able to provide them with spiritual counseling for them to know that they have a second chance. At this point I think all we can do is pray for them.
Hey kourtney told me about your website. I thought I’d come show you some support. It’s Chrissy. I’ve been outta the loop. I absolutely cannot believe Chris Brown would do something like that. He seems like such a genuine guy. I don’t know any of the details, but wow, that’s a shock. However, I have seen other men lead the same path he has only to become abusers themselves, even when they swear against it. I wouldn’t have thought Chris Brown to be the type though. Anyway congratulations on ur page!
“I’ll never hit a woman…but I’ll choke the @#$% outta her!”
-Comedian Chris Rock
Hey Common Cents, being the comedian he is, surely Chris Rock was joking!
Rihanna and Chris Brown reported back togetherBy Reuters
February 27, 2009 5:45 PM PST
celebs:Chris BrownRihanna
LOS ANGELES (Reuters) – Pop star Rihanna was reported on Friday to have reunited with her R&B singer boyfriend Chris Brown , less than three weeks after he was alleged to have assaulted her.
People magazine said Barbados-born Rihanna — who had hits with “Umbrella” and “Disturbia” — and Brown were spending time together at one of the homes of hip hop mogul Sean “Diddy” Combs.
“They’re together again. They care for each other,” People quoted an unidentified source as saying.
“While Chris is reflective and saddened about what happened, he is really happy to be with the woman he loves,” the source said in a report on People’s website.
A representative of Chris Brown had no comment on the People report. Rihanna ’s publicist could not immediately be reached.
Brown, 19, a rising young star with a huge teen fan base, was arrested on February 8 on suspicion of making criminal threats against a woman after a late-night altercation in a car.
Los Angeles prosecutors have not yet decided whether to file formal charges against Brown, who performed chart-toppers “Run It!” and “Forever.”
A picture of a bruised Rihanna with swollen lips was leaked on the Internet last week, apparently from Los Angeles police files, and added credence to widespread reports that the woman involved was her.
The assault on the eve of the Grammy Awards caused both stars to cancel their scheduled appearances. It sent shockwaves through the music industry and stunned fans of the couple, who had been dating for about a year.
Rihanna returned to her family in Barbados and Brown issued a statement on February 15 saying he was “sorry and saddened” about the incident and was seeking counseling.
People magazine reported earlier this week that Brown telephoned Rihanna on her 21st birthday a week ago.
“He called to wish her happy birthday,” a source told the magazine. “They’ve reached out to each other. It’s been mutual.”
I figured they would get back together. Statistics say it takes seven times for a woman to leave, after being abused, before she permanently leaves her abuser.
Well well well, I hope nothing happens to cause any more problems for them. They are both too gifted and talented to allow things to mess up their careers.
The bruises haven’t healed, the swelling hasn’t gone down and he hasn’t completed any kind of extensive counselling, but yet she’s back???? Can you say, “STUPID!”
Yep, that’s how it appears, stupid, but unless and until we are in another person’s shoes, we can’t judge. Leaving him and staying away from him seems logical to us but we have absolutely no feelings involved, she does. Those feeling obviously didn’t dissipate when the abuse occurred. Are her actions stupid or the ultimate act of forgiveness?
Interesting spin Kathy. You’re obviously a thinker. I don’t know your marital state but if that happened to you would you be so forgiving?
I am married and dunno what I would do. It is always sooo very easy to say what we would and wouldn’t do when we are not in a situation. I worked in domestic violence for 2 1/2 years. It’s not as simple as it seems. Really. As crazy as it is, the abuser and victim are usually in love. Like I said before, that love doesn’t just vanish because he hits her or she hits him. BTW: Rihanna and Chris aren’t married. What would your do if you husband physically (I specify physically because I’m convinced we have all been abusers and victims of verbal, mental, and emotional abuse) abused you?
We had a shoving match long ago. We talked about it and decided not to go dwon that road again. I let him have the last word on things now if we disagree. Sometimes I don’t like it but I believe I’m in a submissive role according to the bible. ( Some women don’t believe this..at least their actions say they don’t)
If he beat me like Brown did i’d be gone. He’d be in jail.
I’m surprised by your answer b.t.w. Well I don’t know you, but I had the impression you wouldn’t stand for being abused. Again you and I differ on a subject..
Hey Delores I know you’re listening. What’s your feelings on this?
We really don’t differ. I won’t stand for being abused. In my opinion standing for abuse is standing still while he repeatedly abuses me. I know that sounds simple, but standing for abuse as opposed to not standing for abuse is not a black and white issue. There are gray areas…
Ok, I hear you when you say, he’d be gone and he’d be in jail, but would he stay gone? Is there a chance you, like Rihanna, would allow him back? Unfortunately, Chris and Rihanna are in the public eye. If the same thing happened to you or me, only a select few would know. Now, what if Chris has apologized, got himself right with God, committed to counseling and is determined to not repeat his actions. Is it still wrong for Rihanna to take him back?
Your point is taken and understood. You are making some excellent points. Some of those same points are why some women are dead today.
This may help Below is a list of behaviors that are seen in people who beat their partners. If the person has several (three or more) of these behaviors, there is a strong potential for physical violence – the more signs a person has, the more likely the person is a batterer. In some cases a batterer may only have a couple of behaviors a woman can recognize, but they are very exaggerated (e.g. extreme jealousy over ridiculous things). In the beginning these behaviors can be “explained” by the batterer as love and concern. However, as time goes on these behaviors become more severe and serve to establish, keep, and strengthen power and control over the victim.
JEALOUSY: At the beginning of a relationship an abuser will always say that jealousy is a sign of love. Jealousy has nothing to do with love. It’s a sign of possessiveness and lack of trust. The abuser will question his partner about whom she talks to, accuse her of flirting, or be jealous of time she spends with family, friends, or children. As jealousy progresses, the abuser may call her frequently or drop by unexpectedly. The abuser may refuse to let her work for fear she will meet someone else, or even do strange things such as checking her car mileage or asking friends to watch her.
CONTROLLING BEHAVIOR: At first the batterer will say that this behavior is because of concern for his partner’s safety and well being. The abuser will be angry if his partner is “late” coming back from the store or elsewhere and will question her closely about where she went, to whom she spoke, etc. As this behavior gets worse, the abuser may not let his partner make personal decisions about the house, her clothing, going to church. He may keep all the money or even make her ask permission to leave the house or room.
QUICK INVOLVEMENT: Many battered women dated or knew their abuser for less than six months before they were married, engaged, or living together. An abuser comes on like a whirlwind, claiming, “You’re the only person I could ever talk to,” “I’ve never felt loved like this by anyone.” The abuser will pressure his partner to commit to the relationship in such a way that later she may feel very guilty or that she is “letting him down” if she wants to slow down involvement or break off the relationship.
UNREALISTIC EXPECTATIONS: Abusive people will expect their partner to meet all of their needs; the abuser expects his partner to be the perfect wife, mother, lover, friend, and will say things like, “If you love me, I’m all you need – you’re all I need.” She is supposed to take care of everything for the abuser emotionally and in the home.
ISOLATION: The Abusive person tried to cut off his partner from all resources. If she has men friends, she’s a whore; if she has women friends, she’s a lesbian; if she’s close to her family, she’s “tied to the apron string.” The abuser accuses people who are supportive to his partner of “causing trouble.” The abuser may want to live in the country without a phone, may not let his partner use the car (or have one that’s reliable), or may try to keep her from working, going to school, or church.
BLAMES OTHERS FOR PROBLEMS: If the abuser is chronically unemployed, someone is out to get him, someone is always doing him wrong. The abuser may make mistakes and then blame his partner for upsetting him and keeping him from concentrating on the work. The abuser will tell his partner that she is at fault for almost anything that goes wrong.
BLAMES OTHERS FOR FEELINGS: The abuser will tell his partner, “You make me so mad,” You’re hurting me by not doing what I tell you,” or “I can’t help being angry.” The abuser really makes the decision about what he thinks or feels but will use feelings to manipulate his partner. Less obvious are claims that “You make me happy,” or “You control how I feel.”
HYPERSENSITIVITY: An abuser is easily insulted, claiming his feelings are hurt when he’s really mad, or taking the slightest setbacks as personal attacks. The abuser will rant and rave about the injustice of things that happen – things that are really just a part of life, like being asked to work overtime, getting a traffic ticket, being told behavior is annoying, or being asked to help with chores.
CRUELTY TO ANIMALS AND CHILDREN: This is a person who kills or punishes animals brutally or is insensitive to their pain and suffering. The abuser may expect children to do things that are way beyond their ability (such as, whipping a two-year-old for wetting a diaper) or the abuser may tease children or young brothers and sisters until they cry. The abuser may not want the children to eat at the table or will expect them to stay in their room all evening while the abuser is home.
“PLAYFUL” USE OF FORCE IN SEX: This kind of person may like to throw his partner down and hold her down during sex. The abuser may want to act out fantasies during sex where his partner is helpless and will let her know that the idea of rape is exciting. The abuser may show little concern about whether his partner wants to have sex or will use sulking behavior or anger to manipulate her into compliance. The abuser may start having sex with his partner while she is sleeping or demand sex when she is ill or tired.
VERBAL ABUSE: In addition to saying things that are meant to be cruel and hurtful, this can be seen when the abuser degrades his partner, cursing her, running down her accomplishments. The abuser will tell his partner that she is stupid and unable to function without him. This may involve waking his partner up to verbally abuse her and not letting her go to sleep.
RIGID SEX ROLES: The abuser expects his partner to serve him, perhaps saying that she must stay at home, or that she must obey him in all things- even things that are criminal in nature. The abuser will see women as inferior, responsible for menial tasks, stupid, and unable to be a whole person without a relationship.
DR. JEKYLL & MR. HYDE: Many women are confused by their abuser’s “sudden” mood changes – they may think that the abuser has some mental problem because one minute the abuser is really nice and the next minute the abuser is exploding. Explosiveness and moodiness are typical of people who abuse their parents, and these behaviors are related to other characteristics such as hypersensitivity.
** The following four signs are found in those who are indeed batterers.
PAST BATTERING: An abuser may say that he has hit women in the past but it was the woman’s fault, or that it was the only time. The woman may hear from relatives or ex-partners that the person is abusive. A batterer will beat any woman he is with if she is with him long enough for the violence to begin; situational circumstances do not make a person abusive.
THREATS OF VIOLENCE: This includes any threat of physical force meant to control the woman – “I’ll slap your mouth off.” “I’ll kill you.” “I’ll break your neck.” Though most people do not threaten their partners, a batterer will try to excuse threats, saying that “everybody talks like that.”
BREAKING OR STRIKING OBJECTS: This behavior is used as punishment (breaking loved possessions), but is used mostly to terrorize his partner into submission. The abuser may beat on tables with his fist, throw objects around or near his partner. Again, this is a very remarkable behavior – not only is this a sign of extreme emotional immaturity, but there is a great danger when someone thinks they have the “right” to punish or frighten their partner.
ANY FORCE DURING AN ARGUMENT: This may involve a batterer holding a woman down, physically restraining her from leaving the room, any pushing or shoving. The abuser may hold his partner against the wall and say, “You’re going to listen to me!”
As I said, I worked at a domestic violence shelter for 2 1/2 years and I saw one of our “success stories” (or so we thought) leave the shelter and be murdered by her abuser. I hear everything you are saying and I agree, even without this list, however, there are cases also where the abuser recieved help from God and a therapist and took all the proper steps to change and lead a live of non-violence. That is all I’m saying.
YOU nor I have any idea of all the events surrounding the Chris Brown/Rihanna saga.
The shoving match you and your husband had is abuse. Period. It might be a lesser form of abuse, but still abuse. Manipulation is abuse. Calling names and insults are abuse. I can go on and on. Are you only going to be done with your husband when it gets to a certain level? Things like that – ignoring the first signs and disregarding them as “we were JUST blah blah blah”, is also why some women are dead today.
Did you miss this? “We had a shoving match long ago. We talked about it and decided not to go dwon that road again.”
Ok maybe I wasn’t very clear. We both were pushing. I pushed him first. He pushed back. I wen to slap him and he grabbed my wrist and shoved me to the couch. I got up. He said don’t do what you’re about to do. I left the house and came back. We talked and that was the end of any physical violence. We both decided to never go there again. That was almost 20 years ago.
I didn’t miss that, did you miss me saying that was abuse? Oh wait, let me get this straight, if you both do it to each other at the same time, it cancels out his abuse because you abused him too? So you are both abusers! Ok check this out, I heard reports that say Rihanna fought Chris first!, while he was driving. So…help me here. Is his abuse worse because he is a man and stronger and more capable of doing more harm and obviously did do more harm? This is the kind of slanted stuff that has society screwed up! Wrong is wrong is wrong! Abuse is abuse is abuse but maybe, just maybe Chris and Rihanna talked about it and decided not to go dwon that road again. (I even left in your typo!)
I had 4 brothers so I got away with stuff when I was young. I can recall slapping a few boys and then getting into a fight only to have my brothers come running and beat the poor boy up. I had to get saved Kathy and mature in the Lord.
John and I had to deal with the issue and we did. The fact that he didn’t hit me shows that he was already some what mature. At the time I was kinda spooled and sassy. I would never do that now, nor would he. Had he beat me I would not be married to him today. Can you say the same thing? It sounds like you would stay with your husband.
It sounds like you are someone who knows me and is disguised as someone else. No prob.
I have never said I would stay with my husband nor did I say I wouldn’t. Those are not the points I am making but that is all you seem to want to know. Focus on some of the other points I have made. Abuse is not a matter of opinion, abuse is abuse. It is just a matter of opinion when we as individuals gauge the severity on what we are willing to put up with.
There are some women who would leave if a man shoved her, even if she shoved him too. There are some that would leave for verbal, emotional and mental abuse. There are some that would leave for manipulation. But there are some that stay for it all! There are some that forgive it all! Even if initially they call the police, he is arrested, etc. They will forgive and go back. It is not my relationship and I don’t know everything that has transpired. It is all up to what the individual decides. It may even be a bad or wrong decision, but it is theirs.
Know you? I think not. Paranoia the norm here?