I agree. It is hard to have true friendships where you can completely speak your mind. As old as I have gotten to be, I have learned which friends are capable of hearing certain truths and I basically know how they will react and to be honest, there are only a few folk (I can use one hand and have fingers left) I want to tell me anything. lol. Here’s what we do as people. They tell us some hard truth to hear and we start running down their life/character in our minds! We’ll say/think, how dare she tell me blah blah blah when she got this going on and that going on, etc. How dare she! But (as my mother used to say) the truth gonna stand when the world’s on fire! That still doesn’t make it easy to hear.

I have recently gone through some stuff and I will admit (and it is a hard truth to admit), I talked to too many people! And some of the ones I did talk to, talked to others. And some I didn’t talk to came up with their version of what they thought was happening and now I have opinions and attitudes coming from the left, the right, sideways and upside down! My favorites are the ones that tell me to be lead by my heart and God. Seriously, that is probably the most comforting and logical thing anyone has said to me. But as you said, some of these same people have gone through the same things and did exactly the opposite of what they are telling me to do. Why? They are talking from emotions and have nothing invested in my affairs, although they might say, I’m just looking out for your happiness or well-being.

And other part about it is, once they give you their opinion and advice and you take it, where are they the next day and they next day when you still need someone to talk to? No where to be found! You are out there all alone after doing what they advised. Well, I learn that lesson years ago; MOST friends are friends of convenience. I mean, they are your friends when it is convenient for them! When you really, really, really need them, if… and only if, they can fit you in and work around what they have going on, they will be a friend, if not, oh well! Do you know how many times someone – family and friends – have told me they were going to do x y and z and didn’t? I could run a list of things I have done for them and then when it is my turn, when I really need someone, no go!

True true, who cares what many people think of us? I was never comfortable with that thinking until I came to GA and was talked about and shunned and discounted by women for absolutely no reason! I guess just because I was new. The majority of them had never even held one conversation with me! As lately as Monday one of the women, who treated me bad, told me, “yea, we didn’t know you and once we started talking to you we said, she’s alright!” Holla! Here (GA), you are guilty until proven innocent of no crime! Now, I walk with my head up and honestly could care less what they think! I know who I am, God wrote it in His plan for me!

Sup, please let me be there when you sing it. I will put my hands in the air and sway back and forth and wear a peace symbol on my chest!

And it is so true about those who want to tell you about yourself “in love” but can’t take it when you do the same. I’ve just learned to tune out those type of people. Whatever they have to say to me goes in one ear and out the other. In other words, what they say does not matter to me at all.

Lastly, and I think this is probably the most important lesson I have learned and it was one of the hardest lesson for me to learn – when you are going through things, and emotions are running high, ABSOLUTELY DO NOT share with anyone other than GOD! Because He is the only one that’ll truly guide you in the direction you are suppose to go. If you talk to people, especially family, their emotions get involved, everybody’s hyped, people will tell you what they would do if they were in your shoes, etc. (and we know that’s so not true)and well, there’s just no going back! That may sound harsh, but it’s the truth.
.-= Kim Sawyer´s last blog ..Wordplay Wednesday =-.